The Embarassing Truth Of How I Nearly Died Today

I nearly died today, and it was all my dearest daddy's fault. You see, we were on our way to pick up some delicious Chinese food from Jade Dragon, the best restaurant here in Hinsdale, and me and my dad were listening to some music. As the car stereo blared out Al Stewart's 1988 hit, Time Passages


, my dad became so passionate of the saxophone playing in the background, that he started to air sax. Yes, my dad completely ignored the loud electric guitar, but played an imginary saxophone. One thing that you have to keep in mind is that my dad is the one who is driving this whole time. While he was air-saxing, he totally forgot about the wheel. We swerved nearly off the road, and my dad had to insanely grab the wheel and get ourselves back on the road. I had a little fantasy about how our acceptance into heaven (or hell?) would be.

Gabriel: I think we might have the file wrong... It says here you died because you were pretending to play a saxophone... while you were driving...

Me: It was my dads fault! He was the one who played the imaginary saxaphone!

Dad: Blame your dad, real cool...

Gabriel: So this file is... correct?

Me: Yep, sounds about right.

Gabriel: That is officially the dumbest excuse for a car accident I have ever heard! Get back to earth.

I often have these little faux diolouges with myself.